So, what happened? I made several rash decisions. I let my relationship fall apart. I quit a job. I quit smoking. I promptly started back up again. I met a woman, got drunk, went to the world’s seediest, least threatening strip club with her, then ditched my friends to go back to her place and fuck pretty recklessly. I went 2 months without a job. I obsessed over my ex. I went through her e-mail. I went through her Facebook messages. I had a bit of a breakdown. I moved. I got help. I came clean. I cut off contact. I wandered for a bit. I read a lot. I watched some serious movies. I dropped cable in favor of broadband and Netflix. I never looked back. I finally fixed the tail light she busted over a year ago.
I got it together.
A job fell in my lap. That got me out of my recovery cave of an apartment. I went to North Carolina. I got back in the game. I flirted relentlessly with an attractive woman. I got invited to an after hours party with her. As we got in the car to go, I met her boyfriend. I bailed. I went home alone. I went and visited my parents. We went to outlet stores. I made over my wardrobe. I wear more jackets and layers now.
I did not find a date. In a one week span I asked out 3 women. One said yes, then canceled because of ex issues. A second blurted out her ex issues as I was popping the invitation. A third, with whom I had been in frequent contact, had a secret boyfriend. In Tucson. Where my ex and I had moved from. The universe was telling me something indecipherable.
I got a profile on a dating site. I wrestle daily with it. I have a hard time describing myself. I want to set my profile on fire. I need new pictures. I’m more insecure about my online presence than my corporeal presence. Isn’t it supposed to go the other way?
I saved some money. I got solvent. I got golf clubs. I got the highest paying job I’ve had so far in LA. I got healed. I got some baggage, but I like to think it’s of the carry-on variety and not the backpacking across Europe variety. I got a grooming regimen. I got plans. I got writing. I got out more. I got hiking. I got to the beach. I got the band back together, so to speak.
Like I said, I got it together.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
What grabs me about this one is the pacing - all those fabulous short sentences! - and the tone, which is matter-of-fact & confessional at the same time. I truly love 'I got some baggage, but I like to think it's of the carry-on variety and not the backpacking across Europe variety.' You are really, really good at these very funny, very true lines.
ReplyDelete