Mint Condition - Judy Albietz

I was so relieved today to read in the paper that my aging brain is truly in “mint” condition. Here I was worrying about my mind going fuzzy. But the article cleared up all those concerns. In fact, it looks like our brains just get better with age. That was the first piece of good news I’d heard about getting older.

Just last week, my adult children had an intervention. They told me I was losing my hearing. I wasn’t responding to questions. In conversations, I was asking them to repeat themselves. When I asked my husband about it, he said he didn’t notice anything, but suggested a hearing test to resolve the issue. “After all, the test is free,” he said.

I didn’t want to be one of those old people who are always cocking their head to the side while they ask, “Whatya say?” So I found a nearby hearing aid clinic which had just gotten a cancellation. That probably happens a lot in their business. After all, they work with people on their last legs of life.

The shop was brightly lit like a department store. I was excited to see the pretty hearing aids lined up in a large glass case. Shopping! That got my attention. What fun new technology! Did you know these new hearing aids have Blue Tooth technology? The receptionist said I could pick up a device at Radio Shack to link up my Ipod and Blackberry with the hearing aid. I heard you can even use Blue Tooth to start your car up remotely. Might be a good idea, at least until I fail the eye test and they take my driver’s license away.

The hearing test lasted an hour. The technician said there was nothing wrong with my hearing. I was disappointed. I had to go home empty-handed. No shiny new Blue Tooth gadget. Maybe now I can afford an iPad.