I Knew You'd Call - Karen Oliver

I knew you’d call sometime when you got over whatever weirdness was keeping you silent. The problem is that I notice your absence and it has a presence in itself. Funny how that works. The space becomes an entity and fills space. Seems like a paradox but the statement gives energy itself the heft it deserves. We think of space and of energy as invisible, and maybe not really present. One has to feel them, to know they are there. They can be dismissed and you can be ridiculed for mentioning them because they aren’t materially present and you cannot “prove” that they speak to you. However, anyone who has had a friend stop taking her calls or had someone give her the silent treatment knows the power of the energy of silence. It can be more powerful, by far, than words.

I think about passive resistance, the Gandhi kind, and the power of that energy, that space. I recall the mothers of the “disappeared” who brought down the government by silently walking around the town squares at lunch, day after day. Nothing was happening and that “nothing” filled everyone with strength, power and grace.

Where is the source that this “not calling” comes from? In me, it leaves a void that my mind wants to fill. Could it be this reason, could it be that? I could analyze and worry it forever, allowing you to use your silent weapon as long as I cooperate. However, I think I will just go on with my life, realize that your problem does not have to be my problem unless you choose to enlighten me about it. For now, I will just know that you will call, or not.